Sunday, October 22, 2006

Yup. We Lost


The Observer | World | How Iraq came home to haunt America: "For months doubts over Iraq have risen along with the death toll. Last week a tipping point was reached as political leaders in Washington and London began openly to think the unthinkable: that the war was lost"

It was tough to admit during the war in Vietnam and it's tough to admit now: we lost. We took out the local tin pot dictator and prised the lid off a cauldron of cultural diversity. Now, predictably, the tribes are beating up on one another and warlords who can muster street gangs of lower class youths from the urban slums, dignified as "militias," are having the time of their lives.

However all is not lost: I have a plan.

(1) Declare an independent state of Kurdistan and promise Turkey admission to the EU if they'll recognize it.

(2) Require the independent state of Kurdistan to recognize a right of return for Kurds outside its borders comparable to the right of return Israel recognizes for Jews. If Turkish Kurds, affirming their ethnicity, prefer living in a Kurdish state to living in an EU country jolly good--I doubt that the Turks will miss them.

(3) Give educated, middle class, non-tribal Iraqis green cards and airlift them out to the US. We trashed their country and destroyed their lives--we take responsibility.

(4) Leave the tribal, lower class Shiites and Sunnis to fight it out amongst themselves over oil, land, women, goats or whatever it is they traditionally fight about until they manage to kill one another off.

How's that? Remember, you heard it here first.

3 comments:

Boofykatz said...

I am unreservedly in favour. we have quite a lot of ethnic kurds where I live. By and large they are hardworking well behaved people who don't make a fetish of their religion. Bring it on home.

Radicalfeministpoet said...

Howzabout (5): Patch things up with Mr Saddam Hussein and put him back in charge of the country. It's obvious he's the only guy who could keep the place under control, and I'm sure he's learned his lesson.

, from "The Bad Child's Book Of Beasts"

H. E. said...

Or (6): withdraw now and let them kill one another off (after airlifting out the civilized elite of course). In fact this might be a good strategy for dealing with the entire "developing world"

Crooked Timber seems to have latched on to my airlift idea though: http://crookedtimber.org/2006/11/14/an-option-hitchens-doesnt-consider